FTW Fury, Episode 3 (Pro Wrestling RP)

[The Second City Wrestlerette]

*Five minutes ago*

“No, Linds! NO! We're going back to our motel and we're going there NOW!”

“But...but Lisa!”

Angrily stuffing my ruined Blackhawks sweater into my duffel bag, my back turned towards Lindsay who's still trying to calm me down after what went down with Sadie in the catering area.

“No buts!” I take a deep breath and turn around, now wearing my Second City Starr t-shirt “This day has been HORRIBLE! We're here even though it's our day off. We missed the big Countdown breakup 'cause you were hiding from a cat! And then that little bitch Sadie threw Guacamole at me! Oh and of course, I had to BUY my own f***ing shirt at some merch stand!  I've had enough for today. And I swear by the almighty gods, the next person who even looks at me funny is gonna eat my fist!!”

Lindsay takes a deep breath and sighs a little, looking at the floor “Let's just watch the Main Event, ok? Like...it's just one more match?” she points at the TV screen.

Looking up at it, I see Callista ruining Fukushima's knee in that Stretch Muffler and I shake my head “It's over. Let's go!” I finish packing my stuff and throw my bag over my shoulder “Can we?”

“But...she's not...I think that girl needs some help! Can't we-”

“There's your help!” as Tiffany runs in to clobber Calli “Can we go now??”

Then Sadie runs in “Oh no! I think we really should...”

Tiffany turns things around “See? She's got everything under control. Come on, now!”

Red comes in and they all start stomping away on Tiffany after Red and Sadie corrupted our Tag Finisher, which actually makes me narrow my eyes and growl at the TV.

“Lisa!! Look, she...she really needs help! Come on, let's go! We have to! It's the Countdown! You don't like Countdown! Come on! Tiffany doesn't stand a chance against those three! And...and you also get to take out Callista and Sadie, isn't that something?? Come oooooooon, Lisa!!”

I sigh and roll my eyes as she starts tugging at my arm like some needy child who saw an ice cream truck. “Alright, alright, LET ME GO!!” Pulling my arm free before around to put my bag back into the locker. “But we can't just run down there and swing at everything that moves! We need a plan. The best thing probably is for you to take out Red, I kick Sadie's head off, and then we can focus on Quinn. She wants to act like a Queen? So we're gonna give her a Royal Beatdown! How's that sound, Linds?”

I turn around to see...nothing!! “Linds?? Awe come on!!! WAIT UP!!”

Running towards the door, wanting to stay right behind her...or at least catch up. But just as I reach it, there they are again. The Mulkey Cousins! The slightly taller Billie supports Randi, one of her arms across her shoulders as that girl still looks a little shaken up after Sadie pulled her into my Superkick and I put her lights out. Billie stares down at me, not looking too happy, and then starts babbling in that South Carolina hillbilly accent.

“I think you owe Randi an apology!”

“Seriously? I got no time for this, Linds is out there and..."

“I think you owe Randi an apology!” she repeats in a much sterner voice

I look at Randi, then back up at Billie.

“I think YOU owe ME an apology!”

“What for?”

“For hurting my hand!” And with that my right fist flies up and, just like I promised Lindsay a few minutes ago, the next girl who even looks at me funny, in this case it's Billie Mulkey, eats my fist. Slamming her right in that pretty mouth of hers, which takes her down, and her cousin falls right along with her. The cousins lay in a heap as I shake my hand out and look down at them. Muttering a quiet little “Idiots...” before taking off to follow Lindsay. Hoping I can get out there in time to keep her from being bullied in a 3 on 1.

[The Second City Wrestlerette]

LvK: Lindsay has got to get out of that ring or she's going to end up just like Tiffany.

RP: That's what happens when you mess with Queen Callista and Countdown. You get conquered. She should have just stayed in the back. Now she's learning her lesson the hard way.

LvK: There's no need for this! They've proven their point. Just get out of that ring already and leave Tiffany and Lindsay alone!

RP: Nope! The message needs to be sent. And the only way these girls seem to understand it, is through violence. And we all know that Queen Callista is great at violence!

LvK: Would you please stop calling her that?

RP: NEVER!

Callista still stands above Lindsay, staring down at her as she slowly inches closer. Red crawls towards Sadie on his hands and knees, checking if she's okay after running right into Lindsay's Big Boot. It's obvious that Callista's mind is working right now. Thinking about how to dish out a maximum of pain with minimal effort.

Yeah...that's not gonna happen!

A pop bursts through the crowd as I come running down towards the ring to see the scene. Calli's back turned towards the ramp and therefore, me. But of course, being the super smart ring General that she is, she hears the sign and turns around. Problem for her is, that I'm pretty fast and already on the apron. And in one quick move, I leap up, landing on the top rope and pushing off towards her.

Her eyes grow as I'm airborne as soon as she turns and I come flying in towards her. My left foot extended, I press it against her shoulder for a little 'stand' and then swing my right foot around. Looking to repeat what she just did with Lindsay. Only that I'm not kicking at her leg, but aim for the side of her face.

And...

WHACK!!

LvK: Starr! From outta nowhere!

RP: Isn't that phrase copyright reserved?

LvK: And just in time! She leveled the Champion with the Stage Dive!

RP: Are you ignoring me?

LvK: Lindsay was about to be mugged! Thank god Lisa showed up in time!

RP: He's ignoring me!!

Calli goes down as I twist in the air and land on my hands and knees with a thud. The crowd's on their feet for a third time in just a few minutes now, after the third save in a row. It's going back and forth like on a Basketball Court right now! But now I'm here, and I'm here to beat the buzzer, get the Save, and all the other sports metaphors you can think of.

The Champ rolls out of the ring to recover as I get back to my feet. Looking around for a moment, seeing Sadie push Red away and jump to her feet. She doesn't look too happy, and neither do I. Round One in the backstage area ended in a draw. And neither of us likes that. Waving her in with my right hand, and here she comes!

Charging at me just like she did at Lindsay a few minutes ago. And it ends the same way...with a miss. I duck underneath her wild approach, maybe she's still a little woozy after being kicked in the head by Linds. She misses me, I set myself up, drop into stance. She turns around, and just as she does, I explode towards her.

LvK: SUPERKICK!

BAM! Right on the Money!! I see head fly, a bit of spittle as well, and slapping at my thigh causes this beautiful little SLAPping sound everyone loves to hear when these big kicks get thrown. Sadie falls, lands spread-eagled and I grin from ear to ear. Walking over to her, hands on my hips as I step over her body, standing tall above her. I bend over, staring into those glassy, unfocused eyes.

"Felt pretty good after avoiding this in the back, huh? Newsflash: When Lisa Starr wants to kick your head off...she DOES!" I grin and add "Oh and fyi...when you're coming off the top on an opponent in a Backbreaker, you aim for the FACE, stupid!"

That. Felt. Great. Dropping this mouthy little girl like this? Priceless! Sadly, it feels so good that for a few moments I forget everything that's happened around me. Including the fact that Red is standing in the ring with me. And I doubt that he's too happy about me kicking his little lover into oblivion.

Now it's time to return to reality. The harsh reality! Red quickly moves behind me and locks my arms up in a Full Nelson. And from there on, everything's going extremely fast! I'm pulled up and turned to the side so I'm not standing over Sadie's fallen body anymore. And then I'm going for a ride!

The back of my head and neck lands hard on the canvas as I'm taken down by Red's Shen Long Slam. Just drilling me into the boards with this powerful, quick, brutal Dragon Suplex. The momentum of the impact carries me over so I'm on my knees, staring straight ahead through glassy eyes before going down flat on my chest with my arms wrapped around the back of my head.

RP: And another one bites the dust! When will they learn? When will they ever learn?

LvK: And again, the strength in numbers pays off for the Countdown.

RP: What are you talking about?? I see one, two, THREE girls in the ring with Red, Sadie and Callista. It's a 3 on 3! Perfectly fair. It's not their fault that those blonde bombers were stupid enough to attack them one by one.

Red hisses at me before turning to Sadie again. With everybody down (or out of sight, like Callista who's recovering outside the ring), he takes care of his girl who's coming back to her senses, asking him to "Help me up!" And once she's on her feet again, she points at me "Get HER up! So I can put her down again."

He obliges and pulls me up to my feet by my blonde and blue hair. Swaying on my feet, arms dangling underneath me as I'm bent over.

RP: Retribution time! Starr asked for it! Kicking that poor, helpless girl right in her pretty face for absolutely no reason at all! She deserves to be punished.

LvK: She had plenty of reason to do that!

And here she goes. Sadie runs into the ropes and comes charging in towards me at full speed. While I'm still held up by Red, she closes in and takes me down HARD with her running Angel's Kiss Swinging Neckbreaker, leaving me down on my back in the middle of the ring.

[Callista]

I do not like chaos.

To clarify, I do not like chaos which is not of my own making. This mess in the ring with bodies strewn everywhere and agendas thrown out in the heat of battle is not of my own making.

So I need to fix that.

Sadie and Red had just dropped Lisa, while Tiffany and Lindsay were both struggling to get back into the fight. The latter was right in front of me, and was (once again) not paying attention to me, so I reached under the bottom rope, taking solid hold of her right ankle, yanking the Yank twice, once to pull her off balance and send her crashing to the mat, and a second to pull her out of the ring, sending her crashing to the floor.

"Look me in the eye now," I said tartly, giving the blonde a quick kick to the side of the head before rolling under the bottom ropes. Sadie and Red were checking on each other's well-being, (which is not a euphemism, thank whatever Gods you believe in,) but my attention was focused on Tiffany, the one who started all this in the first place.

"Her!" I said, pointing to the platinum blonde still not steady on her feet, adding, "In the corner!" before I rushed towards her. Tiffany tried to get her hands up, but I was able to seize her right wrist in my left hand, turning the arm behind her. She took a swing at me with her left, but I was able to get my right arm up to catch most of the blow. She didn't get a second chance, as Red came in and grabbed hold of that left arm. Before she had a chance to do more than struggle against our grasp, Sadie's boots came flying in between us, catching Tiffany right in her D cups and sending her staggering backwards.

"Put her in the corner, Red!" I said. He nodded and ducked his head, charging forward and driving his shoulder into Tiffany's abdomen, driving her back into the corner pads. He grabbed the middle ropes, pulling himself into her to keep her in place. Tiffany, still fighting, tried to drive a double axe handle blow in between Red's shoulder blades, but there wasn't a lot of force behind the blow, and the big fella held steady.

I climbed through the ropes, moving along the apron towards the corner where Tiffany was held. She was going for an axe-handle again, but got distracted by me smacking her in the side of her head, saying, "Enough of that, now!" Reaching around her head with my left arm, I took hold of her right wrist, pulling it across her neck and sliding my left arm under the crook of her elbow, tightening that hold in place.

I looked to Red right in front of me, and Sadie in the middle of the ring, taking a moment to decide what order to give next. I'm not knocking these two by saying if it were Megan and Gemma, I wouldn't need to. Those two have enough of a history with me, (to say nothing of an almost mystical connection to the mere concept of violence,) to just run with it, but it seemed clear to me that Red and Sadie, like most of humanity, needed to be led.

Unfortunately, also like most of humanity, they were vulnerable to an uppercut to the junk, which was what Lisa had just given Sadie in the middle of the ring. "Red!" I said, trying to alert him to the peril his erstwhile charge was in, when I felt two hands clasp my ankles. "Ah sh-" I started to say, not needing to look down to know who this was, when Lindsay pulled hard, sending me crashing down to the floor.

Looking up, I saw Tiffany drive a knee up into Red's solar plexus before my view was occupied by the tall blonde attempting the punch the living daylights out of me. I got my hands up, ostensibly trying to ward off blows, but eventually getting forward enough to grab for Lindsay's face, curling my fingers into claws and raking them across her, one finger getting enough of a poke in her eye to get her off of me. Pushing myself up off of the ground, I looked in the ring, and despite my best efforts, it was chaos once more.

Before I could do more than face off with a singularly angry-looking Lindsay, (had I ever seen that emotion on her before?) I was slammed into from the right side, driving my left into the ring apron. "NOW BLOODY WHAT?" I shouted, preparing to fight back when I saw Lindsay in the same predicament, as the rest of FTW's referees, security force, and what looked like assorted wrestlers who hadn't worked tonight all rushed down the aisle and into the ring.

A positive truckload of humanity (or whatever passed for it in Asheville interceded, separating blondetard and Countdowner alike.

LvK: About time Security took this mess in hand!
RP: Oh yeah, this is much better than the boring 3 on 3 fight we were watching before. Where did all these people come from anyway?

Sadie rolled out of the right side of the ring of her own accord, while I was able to pull Red out on my side. The impromptu riot squad seemed content to let us move about as long as it wasn't towards the others. Lindsay climbed into the ring, and she and Tiffany and Lisa all stepped up to the ropes, while Red and Sadie and I gathered on the ramp up towards the stage.

I pondered what to make of this. Tiffany coming down I could work with, but the Dragon Starrs complicated things. Some helpful fellow had retrieved my belt, and handed it to me. I held it aloft over my head.

RP: They might've forced a stalemate for now, but the Sadistic Saviour is still the champ!
LvK: For now, Rick. Meanwhile, Tiffany, Lindsay and Lisa are standing tall in the ring while the Countdown is retreating up the steps! Folks we're all out of time for now. For myself and Rick Perle and everyone here at FTW, thanks for watching!
RP: You realize that between the food fight and all of these people working for us there'll be nothing left at catering.
LvK: Oh godda-